Silence is Golden

I'm a big fan of doing tub time during the day with the kids.  It gives us more time to hang out with Daddy in the evening, in the Spring and Summer months they are just too dirty to wait until night on most occasions and it's nice to all get clean at the same time.  I have a separate tub and shower setup in our master bath, so I can keep an eye on them while I shower.  My kids would stay in the bath for hours if I let them, so it works out well that I can sometimes get my laundry folded while I watch them from the bedroom when I'm done with a quick shower.  If I leave to put stuff away in the kids rooms, I'm usually only out of eyesight for five minutes tops.  Now, most parents will tell you that when the kids get quiet is when they start to worry.  So, as long as I hear them yelling at top volume giggling away, things are most often OK.  Not necessarily in the bathroom...

Today I came back to the bathroom to find about half inch of water covering my bathroom floor, counter tops, AND the ceiling.  What the...!?  How??  I mean they're pretty high ceilings.  Jaysus.  PLUS, someone dropped a tootsie roll in there - and NO I'm not talking about the candy.  That would be the girl child.  "I poop in 'dere."  Yes, yes you did honey.  On the plus side, our bathroom is really clean now.

I should've known better after the one time I left and came back to check on them and they were howling with laughter over touching someones private bits - that'd be the boy child's.  AIEEEEEEE.  "NO NO NO!  We don't touch other people's privates, only you can touch your own privates IN private" yada yada yada.  They probably didn't even hear me because I sounded like a howler monkey, just fuhrrreaking out.  All that parent education was swimming in my head trying to come out (wait, what do I tell them about touching their bodies...!?), but in the moment I was just a babbling mess.  That's why I kinda have a love/hate relationship with continuing parent ed (I've done a co-op preschool of some sort with both kids) or parenting books, they're so inspirational and full of great advice.  But when the shit comes down, it ALL flies out the window most of the time.  Never stop trying though, I suppose...  So I'm not sure if I said the right thing, but it hasn't happened again.  Oh. My. God.

After putting the kids down and the unplanned bathroom cleaning (which is the WORST, I feel like I need to prepare and be in a cleaning 'zone'), I was sooo looking forward to my coffee time only to find that the dog had pooped on the carpet.  I am not even making this stuff up.


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